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Welcome back, family. Today’s subject is timely based on a number of conversations with people we’ve had over the past couple of months, both husbands and wives. Lately, as we’ve talked with couples, we’ve noticed a common thread in their language.  “Marriage is a lot of work.” “Relationships are hard.” “Relationships shouldn’t be this hard” “I’m just tired.” And if we’re honest, we understand where those words come from and why couples feel strained as they become one. Becoming one is not something that happens overnight or even over a few years. It is an ongoing process that is not always easy. Yes, marriage requires effort. It is true that relationships often stretch us. And sometimes, especially in seasons of stress or misunderstanding, love can feel heavy and even feel like a lot of work. But consider this in those moments: Our earthly relationships are a reflection of our spiritual relationship with our Father.  Think about your conversion. Everything did not immediately...

Real talk, family: Romance is often misunderstood. Most of us have lived long enough to know that romance is not proven through grand gestures, extravagant gifts, elaborate trips, or perfectly planned moments. In fact, romance may not even result in fireworks. Romance is most powerfully expressed through intention. As Valentine’s Day approaches, I invite couples to remember that romance isn’t about grand gestures alone. Some of the most meaningful moments in my relationship with James were not expensive or big productions (although I enjoyed the big productions as well). They were simple. Quiet. Intentional. Through simply enjoying one another’s presence without pressure or performance we were able to create memorable experiences that were special. Romance creates close connection in your relationship. Close connection leads to both emotional and physical intimacy. Couples who have close connection experience high relationship satisfaction. Not just on holidays, like February 14, but 2...

There is a quiet ache many people carry into relationships. It is the hope of being loved, paired with the fear of being truly known. To be known means to be seen. And to be seen means to risk rejection which is hard for all of us, regardless of our age, gender, or status. Yet, acceptance , real acceptance , is one of the greatest gifts love can offer. This week’s blog will focus on the gift of acceptance . Acceptance is not loving someone for who they could be, your dream version of a person, or even the potential that you see. All of those ideas may be included in your love. But true acceptance means that you love them for who they already are, not who you (are them) want to be. Long before James and I ever became a couple, we were friends. And even then, something about talking or being around James felt safe. I could talk. Really talk. This made it easy to share everything with James. I shared my disappointments, my hurts, my fears, and yes, even the parts of myself I believed mad...

Scripture: “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” — Proverbs 17:22 (NIV)  Reflection: Did you know that fun, laughter, and leisure activities create an essential relationship dynamic that should never be neglected. This represents the time couples spend together to focus on them. It nourishes, replenishes, and strengthens relationships in such a way that not only supports high relationship satisfaction, but also enables a deeper connection for couples to navigate difficult seasons in their relationship easier and better. Remember that joy belongs in marriage too. Nurture your friendship. Friendship is essential to lasting love. Prayer: God, restore joy and lightness in our marriage. Help us laugh, play, and have fun together. Help us to move from our normal routines to be intentional about time together to share our love and lives. We recommit ourselves to honor our vows to love and to cherish till death do us part. Amen. Intentional Action: Do something fun. Create a date night ...

Scripture: 9) Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. 10) If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. 11) Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? 12) Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NIV) Reflection:  Connection doesn’t disappear overnight but fades daily when the relationship is neglected. Today is about turning toward each other again. Choosing closeness. Choosing “connection.” Prayer:  God, help us slow down and truly see one another again. Next to You, make our relationship our greatest priority. We choose each other and are committed to our Covenant. Please, strengthen our bond and remind us how to connect and chose each other everyday. Amen. Intentional Action:  Spend at least 10 uninterrupted minutes talking without phones or...