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There is a quiet ache many people carry into relationships. It is the hope of being loved, paired with the fear of being truly known. To be known means to be seen. And to be seen means to risk rejection which is hard for all of us, regardless of our age, gender, or status. Yet, acceptance , real acceptance , is one of the greatest gifts love can offer. This week’s blog will focus on the gift of acceptance . Acceptance is not loving someone for who they could be, your dream version of a person, or even the potential that you see. All of those ideas may be included in your love. But true acceptance means that you love them for who they already are, not who you (are them) want to be. Long before James and I ever became a couple, we were friends. And even then, something about talking or being around James felt safe. I could talk. Really talk. This made it easy to share everything with James. I shared my disappointments, my hurts, my fears, and yes, even the parts of myself I believed mad...

Scripture: “Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain.” — Psalm 127:1 (NIV) Reflection: Strong marriages are built when God is at the center. This year, we want to be intentional about keeping God at the center of our relationship instead of keeping life so busy that God is placed on the sidelines, waiting to be put in the game. Today, we recommit our covenant to God. We choose one another daily, and commit to the work of strengthening our marriages day-after-day. We recommit to protecting the priority of our marriage, with God at the center.  Prayer: God, we place our marriage fully in Your hands. Lead us, strengthen us, and continue writing our love story. Amen. Intentional Action: Holding hands, reaffirm your commitment to God and to each other out loud.

Heavenly Father, Our God. Thank You for bringing us together in Covenant relationship. Thank you for the love we share. Father, please help us to choose one another with intention each day. Teach us to listen with understanding, speak with kindness, and respond with grace, regardless of what season we are experiencing.  Father God, strengthen our connection emotionally, spiritually, and physically. When life feels heavy, remind us that we are on the same team. Help us to communicate with kindness as we listen to understand, not just respond to win. We promise to keep You at the center of our marriage so our love may grow deeper, stronger, and more secure, to bring You glory. Father, we place our relationship in Your hands, trusting You to guide us, sustain us, and grow us together. Thank you for our marriage. In the Name of Jesus.  Amen. 

As we welcome 2026, our hearts at Covenant Strong are full.of gratitude for every couple, every family, and every individual who has walked this journey with us. Looking Back with Grateful Hearts In 2025, we talked honestly about love. Not the fairy-tale version. Not the “easy when it feels good” kind. But the chosen kind. We shared God’s design for marriage (Covenant vs Contract), building a foundation for forever, faith in action, and the concept of love as a choice, and so much more. We shared our own story about how two people, who started as friends, found themselves swept into a whirlwind love. We were transparent about how we faced the unexpected reality that marriage takes more than feelings to survive. I hope our sharing helped someone, somewhere. Because we understand how difficult marriages can be to navigate in today’s world, we provided, and will continue to provide, what we termed as Foundational Biblical Principles and Fundamental Best Practices (FBPs). This blog (her...

It’s easy to get lost in daily frustrations like bills, miscommunications, and unmet expectations. During the holiday season, busyness and financial stressors can add to your normal, everyday toll. Like Christmas, love is not about receiving, but giving, especially giving what God created as essential gifts to a relationship. This includes things like kindness, patience, mercy, and love.  So, as shared in my previous blogs, the early part of our marriage was difficult to navigate. This was a surprise since we were close friends long before anything romantic happened between us. We made the decision to approach marriage God's way. We discovered that when we prayed together, even short prayers, our disagreements softened and our relationship was strengthened. Our focus shifted from all our frustration to our shared faith. We found that faith helped us zoom out to realize what truly matters, two imperfect people learning to love like Christ.  According to a 2023 Barna study, cou...

It’s funny how the people closest to you can see love forming before you ever recognize it. My best friend saw James’s devotion long before I did once James stayed in the ER with her, refusing to leave her alone, even though he only knew her name. There was always something about the way James looked at me. Something that felt good, sincere - something that felt like home. It was then I suddenly realized - maybe love had been there all along. Maybe I had just been too guarded to see it.  Love doesn’t always arrive with grand gestures. Sometimes it arrives quietly through consistency, loyalty, gentleness, and a steady presence that you didn’t realize had become essential to your life. I believe God's design for love is similar to how he created sunrises. The sun reveals itself slowly at first, then suddenly everything is flooded with light. The sunrise is like a glimpse at greatness, followed by the fulfillment of God's promise.  Our love story was a whirlwind that wasn’t chaot...

Psychologist Dr. John Gottman, who has studied marriages for over 40 years, discovered that couples who are successful don’t avoid conflict but choose kindness, patience, and respect in moments when anger or pride could take over. Studies show the heartbeat of lasting marriages is choosing unity over ego. I dare say choosing a Godly approach to love, even when your emotions don’t align, results in a deeper, richer kind of relationship.  The choice is commitment to one another, even during conflict. Here’s something to remember about choice that sustains love: Stronger, Godly marriages are built on choosing what is right, not just what’s easy or convenient. Some fundamental best practices for loving through conflict include: 1) offering grace instead of criticism. 2) Stay in the room rather than walking away unless you have an agreed upon timeout. 3) Keep your vows not just with your words, but with your actions. This means honoring your routines and responsibilities even when you a...

Love rooted in decision, not emotion , is what creates lasting joy and connection. Let's continue to explore God's model of love for you to experience happy, healthy marriages that last because your foundation is strong. Feelings change and can’t be trusted as a foundation of love. But God’s design for love is based on an act of will and sacrifice , not fleeting desire. The most important element of this concept is an intentional decision to love in contrast to automatic feelings that you can't control.  James and I know how important understanding this model is for couples to create lasting relationships. We both experienced the pain of divorce. I'm not trying to minimize any marital situation that has caused anyone to consider divorce. I just want to encourage couples never to use a permanent solution to resolve a temporary problem. Couples will have conflict, difficulty, and seasons of disconnect . This is when every decision we make can strengthen our bonds of co...

You know that heart-skipping, exciting feeling you called love when you met your spouse? Think back to the long conversations, laughter, and desire to always be together. Beautiful, isn’t it? We often confuse those fleeting feelings, or emotions, with love. But here’s the truth: feeling like these are largely reactions to stimuli with responses that is not meant to last forever. Choice always outlasts emotion. This week, we are continuing our theme of teaching love as a choice. Thankfully, God's example of love is not based on fleeting feelings but on faithful commitment. We were created in His image and must also love others as He loves us. Yes, your love may have began as a spark. But science and Scripture both confirm that real love endures because it’s chosen. The consensus of research related to relationship science estimates that the brain’s “in love” chemical cocktail — dopamine, norepinephrine, and oxytocin has an average peak range of  6 to 24 months. Of course, this phase...

  Marriage and creating a family, even a blended family, should be like mixing two colors of paint — once you mix paint together, you can’t separate them again. Getting paint colors to blend evenly sometimes takes time and even patience. This is also true for couples bringing themselves and any children from another partner into a family. In fact, it not only takes time and patience, but a whole lot of grace as well. We know this because we lived it. When my first marriage ended, I never imagined I would experience love again. But God, in His mercy, forgave my divorce, healed my brokenness, and allowed me to experience love and covenant as He designed marriage. It is true. God is a God of healing, hope, and second chances. Blended families can be quite complex. There are schedules to manage, emotions to soothe, loyalties to balance, and hearts to heal. The truth is, every person in a blended family has experienced some form of hurt or loss — divorce, separation, time, space, and or...